Parenthood, as wonderful as it is, can have a negative impact on careers of both women and men, especially women I submit. The “caregiver bias” and the “motherhood penalty” and the challenge for men who want equal leave periods are all thorny issues. And it seems like they have been so for a very long time without much success for either the lawyers seeking and returning from leave or the firms that suffer unnecessary turnover to fill the retention voids.
As many as ten years ago, when I was presenting a program at a large law firm in Texas, I encountered this issue head on. After my luncheon address, I was asked to meet with the members of the Management Committee. I hoped it signaled that the committee members had been pleased with my program, but I did not know what to expect.
The committee members showed up both in person and virtually from remote offices, and, after some pleasant exchanges, the question presented was “What more can we do for our women lawyers?” Wow, I thought, that’s a long discussion, and my contract is only for a day! Fortunately, I had met with the young woman lawyers earlier that morning, and I had a pretty good idea what was first on their list of grievances. Maternity leave, of course. Although I had my own disappointing tales from so many years ago, I now was being asked to see the issue through the eyes of the all-male Management Committee.
My response went something like this: “For starters, you could respond to the proposed parental leave policy that the Women’s Committee sent you two years ago. And you also could stop referring to the Women’s Committee as the ‘Mom Com’, which the women lawyers find very insulting.” It got the attention of my audience — as in “busted” — and the members of the Management Committee were speechless, perhaps for the first times in their collective lives. And they should have been because they had not performed well.
Ten years later, this is still a very big problem for individual attorneys and also for firms. For firms that have not addressed it with both wisdom and compassion, the issues of poor morale, unfair compensation and being passed over for promotion associated with poor parental leave policies are very costly in terms of attrition and replacement of talent. And for the lawyers caught up in the unresolved issues, the result can be very disruptive and harmful to careers. I know this only too well. My children were born in 1984 and 1985, and my colleagues did not call me “The Queen of Reinvention” for nothing.
The article referenced at the end of this blog appeared recently on Above the Law and should be read by both sides —- those who seek fair treatment without punishment and those who are making the rules. Here are excerpts from that article which provide a much better answer to the question “What can a firm do to support new parents?” Much better, indeed, than the example set by the managers at that particular firm in Texas.
Top leadership will benefit from understanding the value of working parents within the firm and should reflect those insights in decision making related to parental leave policies. … Ensure [that] managers are informed, supportive, and intentional, focused on the long game. Along with the employees, they should develop strategic plans for offboarding and – crucially – re-onboarding on projects and cases so that the employee does not lose [career] ground before and after leave.
[Management should] create a shared language and defined process across the organization while allowing for flexibility to adapt to individual circumstances, and empower parents to be engaged, communicative, and proactive in managing the process surrounding leave.
There is a long way to go, but this is a start. For best results, the article should be read in full.
The Above The Law article can be found at:
https://abovethelaw.com/2026/01/why-firms-cant-afford-to-ignore-working-parents








