I have been MIA for the last day or two because I was having so much fun wrestling with my computer! You see, I am in the final stage of completing the manuscript for my next Best Friends at the Bar book, and this is when it really gets hairy. Up until now, my word processor and I have been getting along quite well. We have a mutual understanding. If I keep the pounding and cursing to a minimum, the word processor does most of what I need. I even have explored some of the nuances of this machine, and I can now do some fancy sort of stuff like make colorful boxes of information with subtle shading—stuff that I think should impress my editor. With more than 100 pages of manuscript, there is plenty of opportunity for pretty boxes to keep the reader awake. But today was different. Today was the day that reminded me of this same day three years ago, and it was painful. Here’s why.
Today was “finishing touch” day. All of the information has been added to the manuscript, the Table of Contents is done, the proposal is completed, and I am hours away from putting it in the USPS—-except for one thing. Today was the day when I needed to put my name and the name of the manuscript on the top left-hand corner of each page. You may wonder why. Presumably my editor has had some experience throwing multiple manuscripts around his office simultaneously (I can only imagine that these were of the not-so-good variety) and having to reassemble them, so that information tucked in the upper left-hand corner can be critical to his mental stability.
Well, I am sure that all of you clever young things are thinking “header” just about now, right? Well, good for you! People like me do not know from header! In fact, people like me try to insert the information manually on each page, thus messing up all of the pretty little colorful boxes and everything in between. Yep, I was reminded of three years ago. Some people live but do not learn.
Fortunately, I have a law student daughter just like you. One call to her familiarized me with this “header” concept—-not that I know how to do it. I just know that it exists as a tool to help me in the future. The actual application will have to wait until I have cleaned up the mess I created, and that should take me at least another day.
Oh, the wonders of technology. Love it and hate it at the same time. But, the good news is that I am learning. As my husband says, Alzheimer’s will not have a chance with me!
This is where I should wax prolific about the benefits of having “people” to do these things for you—people who understand advanced concepts like “header.” But not having people is such a sensitive subject with me—-after having had people for almost 30 years—-that it will only put me in a deeper funk. So, I will save that for another time. Lucky you. Something to look forward to!
Presumably, I will recover shortly from this harrowing experience and be capable of sharing some more useful information with you. Until then, I will be leaning heavily on the Delete button with one hand and clutching a glass of wine with the other. I deserve it!
