Happy Holidays!


Wishing you all a wonderful Holiday Season!  This time of year I take time off from Best Friends at the Bar to spend cherished time with family and friends and to do some holiday entertaining.  It is a glorious time of year, and I am blessed to have so many extraordinary people in my life to enjoy it with me.

This year I will be traveling to New York and New Jersey to see family and friends and also to Wisconsin to bring some holiday cheer to my 100-year-old Mom.  I love to hear her dig deep into her memories and tell us what it was like for her as a child in what was a very different world.

So, I will see you back here at the BFAB Blog in January.  There are lots of exciting things coming up for Best Friends at the Bar in 2016, and I will fill you in then.

Blessings to all of you.  I hope that you will join me in hoping for peace and understanding and a world that better reflects our vision and our values.

Happy Holidays and Safe Travels!

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Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Are you thankful for being a young woman lawyer today?  You should be. I hope that you are thankful to live in a country where women have the same educational and professional opportunities as men and not in a culture where women are disrespected and are denied those very basic freedoms.

So, as ridiculous as that may sound — on days when the work never ends, when the partner never stops demanding more, when the commute to the job is too long because you cannot yet afford to live closer to your office, and when you begin to wonder “What is a weekend?” — try to remember that being a lawyer is a privilege.  Remember that there was a reason you put up with three years of law school to get to this point.  Remember that you had a goal and that you are on your way to accomplishing it.

Today, stuff yourself with turkey and all the trimmings and take some time to relax and rejuvenate over the holiday. Enjoy your family and as much football as you can tolerate.  Be silly and laugh a lot.  The partner is not watching.

Then, go back to the office on Monday and give it your all.  You ARE getting better at this lawyering stuff.  Stick with it and put yourself in a position to make a difference in a world that definitely could use something different.


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Thought For The Day

Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.

Neale Donald Walsch

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Thought For The Day

To forgive is the highest, most beautiful form of love. In return, you will receive untold peace and happiness.

Robert Muller

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Thought For The Day

Let us be grateful to the people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.

Marcel Proust

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Needed: More Women Lawyers in Leadership Positions

Today I am sharing with you excerpts from a recent blog from my friend John Keyser of Common Sense Leadership.  I reference John and his work in my new book, Best Friends at the Bar: Top-Down Leadership for Women Lawyers (Wolters Kluwer/Aspen Publishers 2015), and I find him to be highly effective and thoughtful on the subject of leadership and a great advocate for women in positions of leadership.  Although John does not write specifically for women lawyers, he hits it straight into your ball park with this blog.

Here is some of what John Keyser has to say in his blog “We Need More Women in C-Suites”:

How can it be 2015, and yet brilliant and talented women are still stuck in the pipeline? The “glass ceiling,” coined way back in 1979, is still impenetrable for many women. To a senior businessman like me, this is misguided and unacceptable.

A little background. I have held high-level executive positions in the corporate and not-for- profit worlds for 40 years. During this time I have worked with many highly effective leaders, many of whom are women. These women inspired others with their business smarts and their people skills, and that is leadership.

Yet, while a few of these highly skilled women made it to senior leadership positions, way too many were limited by that damned glass ceiling. And yet men at the top would never admit that. Why? In my mind, it’s because men tend to make assumptions about women. “Yes, she’s very capable, but her family responsibilities will prevent her from traveling as necessary, or as a women, she can’t handle our largest and most difficult clients.”

I hear these assumptions by men over and over again, unfounded assumptions, and I know that often these decisions are made without discussion with the women. These women are not even asked if they are in a position to take on stretch opportunities!

All too often, a man who is less qualified and has not earned the promotion or assignment will be given the job.  As Ilene Lang, former President of Catalyst, observed, a man is promoted based on his potential, while a woman has to earn that promotion over and over again.

Fact is, [w]omen in key positions help favorably effect organizational culture and that is key to how well a company does over time … and is necessary to balance men’s [leadership skills].  …  As examples, women tend to be better communicators, better at relationships, caring about the team, seeking input in decision making and being more risk aware (not risk averse, risk aware). These are every bit as important as men’s boldness, confidence, decisiveness and comfort with risk taking.

Has progress been made? Yes, sure, up to the middle management level, but from there up it continues to be male dominated leadership.  We still face this hidden bias in our business world today!

Now is the time to be forward thinking leaders, be out in front of the change that is coming, and help it happen!

For more information about John Keyser and his program, go to john@johnkeysercoach.com.  Also check out his new book, Make Way For Women: Men and Women Leading Together Improve Culture and Profits.






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Thought For The Day

“Character may be manifested in the great moments, but it is made in the small ones.”

Phillip Brooks

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Thought For The Day

“The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.”

Martin Luther King, Jr.

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